Thursday, January 15, 2009

Grief Share and how it works...

From Jill's comment, I decided that I'd just write what I know about this thing called GriefShare that has become such a part of our lives...
GriefShare is designed to be a small group study. It can be used as 'large group' / 'small group' to accommodate a large setting with small groups forming from that for discussion purposes.
We open with prayer then we do an object lesson that helps focus the participants on the evening's topic. This time is followed by short questions about the previous week's work book exercises.
After this discussion, because we facilitate, it works well for us to take a short bio-break, get fresh coffee and light snack, then we re-form to watch the evening's video.
Church Initiative has done a great job putting together grief experts and those that have gone through grief first-hand to share their stories, insight & encouragement about the evening's topic. These videos last anywhere from 32-40 minutes, and cover various topics related to this journey from mourning to joy of grief.
After the video we have directed questions (this would be a time to break in to smaller groups if necessary) for discussion of the evening's topic.
Each participant has a work book with five days' exercises and one page of 'journaling' exercises to do, these reinforce the week's video topic.
As someone who has traveled the tough road of loss, 'reading a lot of stuff' is sometimes that last thing you want to do...focus is also hard. These exercises are quick and to the point, but they help you think, and reinforce the fact that you aren't crazy, just grieving.
This is a Christ-centered study, so the 'foundation for healing' is discussed at length in the work book, but also referred to in discussions on the video, and within our group.
After the discussion portion of the evening, Randy & I have our group form a very tight circle, (holding hands, shoulder to shoulder...because we are doing battle, and I believe this helps us appear battle-ready) and have a group prayer. Sometimes in our grief, it's hard to pray out loud, so I just usually close the evening with one prayer, as opposed to everyone praying in turn.
When we grieve, everything around us is in chaos. Because of this fact, we believe and strive for the time spent in these sessions to be very predictable, there's comfort there. And, yes, our group becomes very tight-knit...we meet together for 13 weeks, and know each other's stories & struggles well in that time. And, yes, when the 13 weeks are finished, the grief is still there...it doesn't magically disappear, but progress has been made toward healing. Every participant in our last session that responded to our survey said that the class helped them in healing.
We host these sessions in a little house on our church's campus that we've been blessed to be able to call 'Macy's Place'. It is small, cozy, and comfortable for those that come in.
Our hope is for this ministry to grow to what ever God has in mind for it...we'll see!--And, continue to give Him praise & glory for all that He does there!
Because of the nature of this ministry, and because our community is small, we spend a lot of time at the funeral home...we write notes to people we know that have recently suffered loss, to invite them to join us, if they feel ready.
If your church is considering this type-ministry, there is a video boot camp that can be purchased, or they also have one-day live seminars for a wealth of information and training. The people at Church Initiative are such a blessing to work with, I would encourage every church in our union to offer this ministry.
The website for griefshare is http://www.griefshare.org/
There is a group locator on that site that you can type in your zip code, and it will give you a list of the groups near you.

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